A little while ago, I rewatched the Star Wars prequels, and I ended up thinking how I would rewrite them.  I slowly added notes to a plaintext file, and I eventually ended up with quite a bit of material.

The other day, I decided that I would make a video about it, and on that video I said that I would share the notes.  Here they are.

* Darth Maul and Darth Tyrannus are in all three movies.

* Tyrannus is Sidious’ first apprentice. Maul is introduced because Sidious wants to manipulate Tyrannus by making him jealous.

* The explanation of why Maul was taken as an apprentice needs to be in-media-res, because the Clone Wars will have already started when the first episode opens. (See “Clone Wars” section.)

* The two are jockeying for power, trying to destroy each other to become the true apprentice of Sidious.

* Maul actually plans to kill Sidious and become the new Sith Master (and Sidious is aware of this, as Maul tells him plainly), but Tyrannus has a devotion to Sidious.

* An unhealthy devotion, of course, since Sidious is playing the game between Maul and Tyrannus.

* Anakin kills both of them as well as Qui-Gon Jinn to become Vader at the end of the third movie.

* When Sidious realizes he’s much more powerful than Maul and Tyrannus, he decides to have him take them out.

* Republic’s Army

* Storm Troopers do not have their origins in Clone Troopers (see “Clone Wars” section).

* The precursor to the storm troopers are just the soldiers of the Republic, recruited from civilians similarly to how the US recruits soldiers.

* The Republic Army’s general is Tarkin (the same who later becomes governor sometime before Ep 4 starts), who often clashes with the Jedi Council on how harshly to deal with the Separatists.

* Separatists

* “Separatist” is a catch-all term for all groups that want to leave the Republic, but many of these groups actually want to wipe out the Republic.

* None of the Separatist groups are peaceful, and all are corrupt in some form or another.

* Clones

* Clones are used by the Separatist armies (not the Republic).

* The original prototype of the clones must remain unknown (to both the viewer and the Jedi Council).

* Clone Wars

* Clone armies are used by both Maul and Tyrannus to fight against each other and to terrorize the people of the Republic to please Sidious.

* (Note that Maul does not actually command an army but manipulates them. This becomes clearer later in this section.)

* But they do have some support among some people groups, who make up the Separatists (see “Separatists” section).

* Tyrannus’ army greatly outnumbers Maul’s.

* Tyrannus typically stays off the battlefield himself.

* Maul repeatedly wins battles against Tyrannus’ army single-handedly.

* Maul is not commander of his army and doesn’t hold a rank of any kind (fits in more with his lone wolf personality). He controls the army through Sith mind tricks of the general (see “Jango Fett” section).

* The Clone Wars end when Anakin kills both Maul and Tyrannus at the end of Ep 3.

* All clones are conscripted by force to become storm troopers by Palpatine after the Clone Wars end.

* Droid armies

* Nope.

* General Grievous

* General Grievous is the general of Tyrannus’ army.

* Grievous is hyper-intelligent, but the result of a cloning experiment having gone wrong, so he needs machines to keep him alive.

* Grievous is still killed by Obi-wan.

* Jango Fett

* Jango is the general for a Separatist faction’s army (but not a clone himself).

* Jango comes from one of the people groups that joined the Separatists.

* In appearance, looks much like a general of any army.

* Jango is strongly nationalistic about the war.

* Jango is being controlled by Maul through Sith mind tricks.

* Jango is killed by Maul at some point in Ep 3.

* This way, when the Clone Wars end, Boba is an orphan who ends up having to fend for himself, so he adopts the bounty hunter lifestyle.

* Sith

* There needs to be some kind of discussion of why there are only two Sith.

* Because that way the Dark Side will focus all of its power on just those two.

* This is why a single Sith is very powerful.

* The discussion of Darth Plagueis remains word-for-word in Episode 3. (This is the best part of all seven movies so far.)

* Exception: Palpatine says, at some point in the conversation, “I’ve found that the Jedis’ concept of ‘balance’ in the Force is actually quite one-sided. They want to wipe out the Sith so that only they remain.”

* It also remains very necessary that Anakin learns of nothing about Plagueis from the Jedi. (Their failure to educate him honestly about the Force is one of the most important parts of the story, and the best character development in the entire series thus far.)

* Anakin

* Anakin needs to be very reserved. It makes more sense that way, because it’s more in line with the character of Vader later in the series.

* Anakin is highly-disciplined.

* Anakin needs to have a quiet intensity. Very passionate about his family, very concerned with duty.

* Anakin needs to be close to 30 when he becomes Vader, but a teenager when he begins Jedi training.

* One thing that needs to be unchanged is his motivation for turning to the dark side– Sidious’ description of Plagueis the Wise is the best part of the entire series.

* Anakin turns to the Dark Side because he thinks it’s what’s going to be best for his family.

* Anakin does not ever accidentally lose or break his lightsaber (because that’s dumb).

* Anakin’s family

* Story starts in Episode 1 when Anakin is a teenager, not a child.

* Anakin’s family is not slaves, but poor moisture farmers.

* The story of Anakin’s mother being a virgin when he was born doesn’t happen.

* The story of her being kidnapped by the Sand People and Anakin killing the entire tribe, however, does. (Very important scene.)

* But he doesn’t whine about it to Padme. He remains stone-faced and tells her nothing of it.

* Anakin is raised on the same farm as Luke (later to be inherited by Owen).

* Owen is Anakin’s older (full) brother.

* The Force

* There is no discussion of midichlorians at all, and no concrete test to determine how force-sensitive a person is.

* Qui-Gon Jinn

* Qui-Gon Jinn is alive in all three movies, but is mostly a distant advisor.

* He’s busy on the Jedi Council and only occasionally gives advice to Obi-Wan.

* Anakin kills him on the floor of the Jedi Council.

* Obi-wan and Anakin meet

* Obi-wan meets Anakin in Mos Eisley (and Qui-gon is with Obi-wan in this case).

* Anakin is there for business, but has a blaster to defend himself.

* A fight breaks out in a marketplace, and Obi-wan saves Anakin, but also notices that Anakin is extremely force-sensitive.

* (Anakin himself not really being aware of how he is interacting with the Force, much like Rey in Ep 7).

* Obi-wan convinces Anakin (against Qui-gon’s wishes) to consider joining the Jedi.

* This is very much against his family’s wishes. (Esp. protective older brother Owen, who calls Obi-wan a crazy man.)

* They’re afraid of the Clone Wars (already in progress), and afraid he’ll be killed.

* Anakin leaves under cover of night, only leaving a note for his family.

* Jedi council’s rejection of Anakin

* The Jedi council’s rejection of Anakin remains, and for the same reason. (He’ll be a teenager, though, of course.)

* Qui-gon is also against training Anakin.

* Obi-wan, like Qui-gon in the original version, decides to train Anakin without permission of the Council.

* C-3PO

* 3PO is not introduced until the very last scene of Ep 3, when R2 is brought on board the cruiser.

* This is their first meeting.

* He doesn’t really add anything, and arbitrarily wiping his memory but not R2’s doesn’t make any sense.

* R2

* R2 is a droid owned by the Jedi Council, not Anakin.

* There should be no significant interaction between Anakin and R2.

* This makes more sense for why Ben would express confusion about having owned a droid in the past, but R2 would think of him as a former owner.

* R2 is important in that he’s entrusted with sensitive information by the Council. As a result, he knows pretty much everything that’s going on in the Council, but he’s not thought of as an individual by the Jedi, or at least not Obi-Wan.

* Padme

* Padme is also force-sensitive and even uses a lightsaber, but is not a member of the Jedi Council.

* Anakin and Padme

* Anakin and Padme get married at the end of Ep 1, and it’s not a secret, though the Jedi Council isn’t happy about it.

* Luke and Leia

* Leia is about four years older than Luke.

* Leia is born in episode 2, Luke towards the beginning of episode 3.

* Anakin becomes Vader when Luke is about a year old.

* Shortly after Luke is born, but before Anakin turns to the Dark Side, Anakin expresses a desire to Obi-Wan to teach Luke the ways of the force.

* It’s in this conversation that Anakin tells Obi-Wan that he wants Luke to inherit his own lightsaber.

* Palpatine becomes emperor.

* This remains much as it was in the original version. Palpatine, recently disfigured from the Jedi attack (saved by Anakin), convinces the Senate that a strong central figure is necessary to keep order in the wake of the “Jedi revolt” and because the Republic is fractured and recovering from the Clone Wars.

* Yoda still fights Sidious on the Senate floor.

* It was goofy, but it served the story well.

* Padme’s death

* Anakin kills Padme in their home.

* Padme dies when Luke is about one year old, Leia about five.

* She fights against Anakin (physically), because of his involvement with Palpatine.

* The story of Anakin turning to the Dark Side to save Padme remains, but, when he turns against her and kills her, he shows no regret/remorse of any kind.

* His motivation shifts from saving Padme from death to saving Luke and Leia from Padme’s influence.

* Order 66

* Probably be called something different.

* Vader, and Vader alone, must execute Order 66. No non-force sensitive person or group should ever have an advantage over a well-trained Jedi, even when outnumbered.

* Anakin (as Vader), starts by killing Maul and Tyrannus, then the younglings, then Qui-Gon Jinn (the last one being in front of the entire Jedi Council).

* Anakin/Vader goes to the Jedi Council, with the Jedi Council not knowing (yet) that he’s the one that killed the younglings.

* Here’s, in a nutshell, how the conversation goes, Anakin and Qui-Gon both standing in the center of the room in front of the council:

Qui-gon: Can you confirm whether it was Maul or Tyrannus that killed the younglings?

Anakin: It was neither. They were killed before the younglings were.

Qui-gon: How do you know?

Anakin: Because I killed the younglings, and I killed Maul and Tyrannus first.

Here, the Council becomes visibly concerned.

Qui-gon: Why did you kill them?

Anakin: My master commanded it.

Obi-wan: I commanded no such thing.

Anakin: You are not my master anymore.

It’s at this point that Anakin pulls out his lightsaber and kills Qui-gon.

Anakin then quickly escapes.

* Anakin and Obi-wan battle

* After Anakin (as Vader) kills Qui-gon, he escapes from the Jedi Council to take Luke and Leia away, to raise them in the Dark Side of the Force.

* Obi-wan goes to Anakin’s home and finds Padme’s body, and finds clues to where Vader took Luke and Leia.

* The volcano planet, as a stopgap before taking them somewhere else.

* Obi-Wan finds and stops him, and separates Luke and Leia in case Vader finds one of them (so he won’t find both).

* Note that now it makes more sense for Obi-wan to have a motivation to take Anakin’s lightsaber. (See “Luke and Leia” section.)

* Anakin never says “I hate you” or anything so melodramatic. True to his character described here, he stares cold-faced at Obi-wan.

* What Obi-wan says, however, remains unchaged.

* Instead of “Nooooo”, Vader comes out in the armor silently and Sidious simply says “We have work to do.”

* Obi-wan takes Luke and Leia to their respective homes.

* Leia goes to Alderaan, much like the canonical movies.

* Obi-Wan takes Luke to Owen and Beru.

* At this point in the story, Luke’s grandmother was already killed by the sandpeople and his grandfather died shortly thereafter (supposedly from grief).

* Obi-Wan lies and tells Owen that Anakin was killed by a Sith named Vader.

* Owen tells Obi-wan “It’s your fault. He never should have left. He would never have been killed and he could have helped save our mother. He was our best fighter against the sandpeople before you took him away.”

* Owen says “What’s your name again?” Obi-wan responds “Ben.”

* Because Obi-wan is in severe depression, so he wants to go into seclusion. Changing his name is a way to prevent people from finding him.

* He builds his home on Tatooine so he can keep an eye on Luke.

* Conclusion of Episode 3 and continuation of Order 66

* Episode 3 ends with the Jedi Order dispersed, and Vader beginning a hunt to kill the remaining Jedi.

* The idea being that the Jedi were killed in the gap between Ep 3 and Ep 4.

I’ve written a new story: Journal Entries of the Miskatonic Defector: The Secret Worshipers.  I’ve been reading a lot of H.P. Lovecraft lately, and thought I’d have a go at writing a story in the Lovecraft mythos.

I’m hoping that I’ll be able to start a “Journal Entries of the Miskatonic Defector” series.

I hope you enjoy!  Thanks for reading!

My newest story, and first written in quite some time, Beyond the Finite, is now posted on the following page (listed under the Misc tab):

Beyond the Finite

Of my own works, I would rank it as second best (the best, of course, still being The Redemption of Laitres, even years later).

A few other, minor things:  I’m currently in a stage of life where I have more free time than I did before (due to a career change), and it’s possible that I may start writing more often (especially considering my newfound love of H.P. Lovecraft).  I’ve also thought of rewriting Shallice and Morband because my writing style and taste has changed considerably since I wrote it, and there are a handful of things that, in retrospect, I don’t like very much.  But that’s a big project; I may just leave it as it is.  I may also reorganize the layout of this website, as well.

This page has never been forgotten, even if it hasn’t been updated in quite some time.  It’s been forever in the back of my mind, and, even if nobody’s reading it, I like knowing that what few stories I’ve written are available to the public.

I’ve thought of a few new story ideas, but I haven’t had the energy to put them on paper (writing fiction takes a lot of patience– it’s actually easier to write nonfiction).

Daily Calvin, though, is, for the moment, defunct.  Has been for some time.  That being said, I may bring it back at some point in the future, if I have friends that are interested in it.

Right now, I plan to start another subblog for funny pictures.  There’s already thousands of such websites, I know, so I’m not really catering to anybody except myself.  I just thought I’d enjoy doing it, so I’m going to start it up.  Right now I’m waiting for GoDaddy to finish installing the WordPress application.  More details once it’s up.

Oh, and FYI, I pretty much ignore comments.  Even with Captcha, they’re almost entirely spambots.

Inspired by ESVOnline.org (great site) and DailyLit.com (which is great, but has a very small selection), I created a new blog hosted on this server called Daily Calvin.  It’s technically not a “blog,” though, just in a blog format.  Starting July 15, every day it will have new sections from John Calvin’s Institutes of the Christian Religion.  I was originally just going to have it for myself, but I thought I’d share it with anybody that might be interested.

So, if you’re interested, take a look.

I came across a pretty neat site called Web Fiction Guide that is essentially a listing of a lot of online works, that includes a lot of interesting stuff.  It has short stories, novels, and serials.  Among those listed is a book by Cory Doctorow, who wrote the great Creative Commons book Down and Out in the Magic Kingdom, which I really enjoyed.  I’ve started looking through these listings and found some stuff that I’m definitely interested in reading.

I submitted Shallice and Morband to their listings, and I thought I’d return the favor and give them a shout-out.  It’s definitely a great site and worth looking over.

As a side note, Shallice and Morband has also been available in the Amazon Kindle Store for a little while now.  That being said, my preferred format is this site, partly because it’s free, unlike Amazon.  (Amazon’s lowest price option was $0.99, but I bumped it to $1 because I like round numbers in prices.)  But if you really like the Kindle format, you can get it there.

I’ve made some more changes to the website design.  It’s now 100% WordPress.  Thanks goes to my friend, Adam, who did the vast majority of the work quite some time ago.  Shallice.com now redirects to shallice.com/wordpress.  The changes should be self-explanatory; it should be pretty easy to navigate around here.  I also made a minor content change in Shallice and Morband, and some minor cosmetic changes.  For example, the text is now a bit bigger, the background image is green, and the logo is in the upper-left corner, like it was on the original site.

These changes will make the site a little easier on the eyes, and will make it significantly easier for me to create new pages.  Not that anyone other than me would care about the latter.

I’ve been mulling over some possible new Elian stories that I might get around to writing eventually (I publish on a “whenever I feel like it” basis).  In the meantime, I want to repost The Redemption of Laitres, because it’s my favorite story that I’ve written.

Update:  Also, I’m going to start allowing comments (pending moderation) as a test run, just to see how it goes.

One more update:  I’m going to try some advertisements, see how that works out.  If it becomes a problem, I won’t be slow to remove them.

Several, several months ago, maybe even over a year ago, a friend of mine did me a favor and installed WordPress to my GoDaddy website.  Then it kind of sat there, unused, for a long time, but I’m now planning on re-establishing it.  I still plan on the main page to be Shallice.com, but I’m planning on using this page, shallice.com/wordpress/blog, as a site for updates.  Not so much because I have a strong desire to use WordPress as much as I really want to have an RSS feed available for updates.  So that means that this WordPress site will only link to the main site, not have any actual content.

(At least at the moment.  As I learn more about how to use WordPress, that may change.)

That being said, there have actually already been three new stories posted since the last WordPress entry:
The Redemption of Laitres
The Disbanding of the Wizard’s Guild
The Origin of the Vampyre

These three had an update on the main page already that I will move here (and backdate).

And, finally… When I logged into WordPress, I found that there were several comments awaiting moderation.  My apologies to the posters; I honestly had no idea that they were even there.  In fact, I didn’t know that anybody other than my friends and family even knew that this page existed.  I’m really not a web guy and WordPress is a little intimidating to me (which is why the main page has the most basic form of HTML that there is).  So it just didn’t occur to me that there would be comments awaiting moderation.

When I finish the site redesign, though, I’m planning on disabling comments altogether (starting with this post).  No offense intended towards the posters (they were mostly very nice comments, though some seemed to be computer-generated spam); it’s just the way I want the site to work.  I would have done that from the beginning if I had gotten my act together and customized the blog when it was first installed.  :\  This isn’t really intended to be a community site; it’s just a place where I post my short stories for anybody to see.  I’m afraid I just don’t have the time or the energy to moderate comments.

(Some of the comments were asking permission to link to my site, and the answer is yes, that is perfectly fine.)

So, I don’t have any new stories right now (but I have some ideas), but I am going to start using this blog as an update site so that an RSS feed will be available.

I’ve started working on a single world that can serve as a background for a number of stories. So far I’ve written three stories in the new Continent Elian series.

The Redemption of Laitres
A man that has been rejected by his society wanders into a small village, not knowing what to expect, and hoping that he may renew his life.

The Disbanding of the Wizard’s Guild
A new power is discovered, but there are unexpected consequences as one elf seeks control over all who would wield it.

The Origin of the Vampyre
One man’s magical experiments give him an incredible power, and he begins a new religion wherein he is worshipped as a god.

(You know, I think I really hate writing synopses.)

This is it… This is the main reason I created this website. I spent about two years writing this in my free time, and now I’m finally distributing it online.
(There is some violence, so this isn’t especially family-friendly)

Shallice and Morband
A prince of the land of Dhelian begins his first ambassadorial duty, and he learns that there is far more to the foreign lands than he expected.